Miscelaneous Byproducts


As we all know, preparing quality meals in the confines of a dormitory or within the confines of a limited food/beer/cigarette budget ain't always easy. This being the case, college students have been known to eat and drink some amazingly smarmy things in pursuit of sustenance, sexual gratification or even just a good laugh. And while there are arguably few things that are more satisfying than summoning up the courage it takes to eat a week old Krispy Creame donut on a dare, there is something to be said of eating things that, while scary to the average viewer, are also good-tasting and stomach filling and which will allow you to remain alive after consuming them.

This page began in the early 1990s, when I was still a poor college student struggling to find sustenance.  During that time, I created and/or bore witness to the creation of dishes that would send chills down the spine of Stephen King.  So I felt imminently qualified to chronicle here some of my favorite quick-fix "food" and "drink" recipes, the miscellaneous by-products to be either avoided or cultivated thereof, and the proper methods and safety precautions used in constructing said dishes. 

With my wife now going through medical school, we suddenly find ourselves poor college students once again.  Seemed like a good time to revisit the page. 

Any recipes you may wish to contribute may be sent to:  Please include the name you'd like to be credited with when submitting.

--E. Fritzius (a.k.a. Mister Herman,) chef, editor and bastard emeritus.


Use caution and common sense when preparing these dishes. Extreme dumbasses capable of screwing  up cold tap water in a glass should not even think about attempting these. Horrible deaths and disfigurements resulting from the preparation of said dishes by said dumbasses, or anyone else for that matter, are in no way the responsibility of the author of this page nor any of the contributing writers, no matter how much we might have wished such torments upon you.